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Trump kills top Iranian general to help get Stormont up and running

US President 'making the streets of Belfast safer' after Clinton Queen's appointment

US President Donald Trump has admitted that the drone strike killing Iranian General Qasem Soleimani was aimed at restoring devolution in Northern Ireland. 

Mr Trump made his remarks, just as the January 13 deadline for the successful agreeing of an agreement draws near. 

“Iran was a big threat to peace in Northern Ireland,” he tweeted, “that part of the world is very precious to me. I have golf courses and hotels there and everything.

“When I heard my old adversary Hilary Clinton was made Chancellor of Belfast University, just to show that I bear her no hard feelings, I thought I’d make the streets of Belfast safer for her when she is over handing out diplomas!” 

DUP leader Arlene Foster said she welcomed any intervention that might increase the chances of a deal. 

SDLP leader Colm Eastwood said he wouldn’t be going near any street made safer by the likes of Donald Trump. 

Sinn Fein’s Michelle O’Neil confessed that the thought of drones gives her the heebie jeebies.

Naomi Long of Alliance told Mr Trump not to be interfering in the internal affairs of Northern Ireland. 

TUV leader Jim Allister rounded on Long, accusing her of stealing one of his one liners.

©Ten Grand Leo

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