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Taoiseach in waiting Mary Lou promises ‘free lucky bags for every unionist’ as gesture of good will – penny chews, gobstoppers, the lot…

SINN Fein leader Mary Lou McDonald has promised to give a free bag of sweeties to every unionist, except the DUP, when she becomes Taoiseach, as a gesture of good will. 

The Shinners are un-questionably on the up after the ultra-nationalist party overtook Fianna Fail and Fine Gael to capture nearly a quarter of the first preference votes in the recent general election. 

Party president Mary Lou McDonald was quick to reassure unionists concerned that this success would mean a tightening the noose on the ‘precious union’ even tighter.

“There will be free lucky bags for every member of the unionist community when I am Taoiseach, as a gesture of good will – penny chews, sherbet fizz, big bubblie gums and gobstoppers  the whole works,” she said, “just to show that our intentions are honourable.

“Except for the DUP who are a shower of sectarian feckers who will be waiting a while before they get one of my lucky bags,” she concluded. 

DUP leader Arlene Foster said she wasn’t hurt by being excluded, but would have expected more, even from a crocodile. 

©Ten Grand Leo

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