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United in glumness: DUP plan ‘doom and gloom’ overture to Republic’s nationalist elite

'Some elections are just a kick in the stones' - Sammy Wilson’s advice for Leo Varadkar

EAST Antrim MP Sammy Wilson has denied that the Sinn Féin’s surge in the Republic’s general election has united unionism in glumness with the south’s ruling nationalist elite. 

“Nonsense, some elections are just a kick in the stones,” Mr Wilson told TGL, “more Leo’s than mine in truth, but you get over it. I wouldn’t be reading too much into it.” 

East Antrim MP Sammy Wilson

The outspoken MP has criticised Leo Varadkar’s Fine Gael government multiple times in recent years over issues that always boil down to a foreign government interfering in the internal affairs of Northern Ireland. 

“Mary Lou can have her hoolie,” Sammy suggested, “she’s not in Carrick yet.

“Carrick is a rock – that’s what it means in Irish! You didn’t know I knew that did you! Yeah, well you’d do well not to be judging!” 

Sinn Fein President Mary Lou McDonald

Despite Mr Wilson’s remarks a DUP source did not rule out “some sort of doom and gloom based overture” being made to parties south of the border. 

“The fact that we all have faces on us like bulldogs licking piss off a nettle is as good a commonality as any,” this person told TGL, “the feeling is growing within the party that something would need to be done before she starts interfering in our internal affairs through official diplomatic channels as well as all the other ways – you know what a clown Boris Johnston is. That idiot would listen to anyone.” 

Sitting Taoiseach Leo Varadkar was too ‘glum’ to confirm anything to TGL with no spokespeople or sources available either, as they were all attending clinic appointments.

Fianna Fail’s Michaél Martin was also reported as feeling ‘glum’, though the silver lining for him is that he might get to be Taoiseach now, something the mammy promised him back when he was wee. 

©Ten Grand Leo

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