BREAKING: DUP wife humour set to be accepted as a genre of comedy

'taking the mickey out of God is out, wise cracking Irish humour is a no no, why not have a joke at the wife's expense'

WISE cracking DUP politicians, making silly jokes about their wives should be inducted into the National Comedy Hall of Fame, it has been suggested.

“For the male DUP representatives to refer to their wife as ‘The Boss’, or humorously assert that irons, dusters, brooms or mops will be the beloved’s Christmas, birthday or Valentine’s Day gift constitutes a unique comedy format,” says comedy academic Cedric O’Connell, “and one that many feel deserves recognition!”

“Just think of the laughs this has raised in speeches, fundraisers and party conferences, even on doorsteps during canvassing. 

“I mean they can’t say fuck in public, dirty jokes are out, Benny Hill tit and bum humour isn’t PC anymore, taking the mickey out of God is out, politics for them is no joke at present, wise cracking Irish humour is a no no, they can’t even pull the pish out of the Shinners, still considered a bunch of murdering bastards underneath the facade of shared government. 

“It doesn’t leave them much so why not have a joke at the wife’s expense,” he concluded.

However Mr O’Connell’s suggestion has been totally rejected by Queens academic Sorcaigh Moggs-Johnston , who has been studying DUP wives for years. 

“Often the more like a traditional housewife the DUP wife appears, the more tray bakes and fancies she makes, the bigger the shrew or wallflower she appears to be in public, the more power she actually wields in reality.”

“‘The Boss’ commonly dictates everything from policy decisions to the underpants the representative wears – the apparent joke is just that DUP representative acknowledging the reality that it will be him getting on the pinny to do ironing and dusting!” 

Both academics dismissed the idea that there was a sexist element to the jokes.

But what about the many female DUP elected representatives? 

Asked to comment on this subject party leader Arlene Foster said that tasteful wife humour was a matter for individual judgement. 

She wouldn’t be drawn on either theory, or the whether her partner was ‘The Boss’ and neither would former South Belfast MP, Emma Little-Pengelly.

Diane Dodds is ‘The Boss’ according to Nigel Dodds, with Nigel being ‘The Boss’ according to Diane.  

The actual truth is unknown, though Nigel probably has plenty of time for pinny wearing and bun making after losing his North Belfast seat, for unlike his wife he did not get co-opted back into Stormont.

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